1. |
I Love Jar Jar Binks
01:36
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Meesa think that you misunderstand
Yousa think that I’m a Star Wars fan
There’s only one character I care about, it’s true
And he comes from a planet called Naboo
He’s received a lot of negative attention
And many Star Wars fans say that he stinks
I don’t really care about what anyone else thinks
I love Jar Jar Binks (2X)
Ugly, cowardly, and insecure
No one calls him hero, that’s for sure
Ask me why I love him, is it not plain to see?
That foolish Gungan reminds me of me
I’ll defend him with the honor of a Jedi
And use the Force to save him if he sinks
A common bond connects us
intergalactic links
I love Jar Jar Binks (2X)
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2. |
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30 plus years ago is when I first played
The greatest platform game that was ever made
The gameplay was action-packed
And it had a killer soundtrack
With epic cinematic scenes
But I can’t beat Ninja Gaiden (3x)
But I’m gonna keep on trying
I read Nintendo Power hoping for a cheat
I used Game Genie too but couldn’t defeat
Bloody Malth was just too strong
And stage 5 was just too long
So I never got to Jaquio
And I can’t beat Ninja Gaiden (3x)
But I’m gonna keep on trying
I can’t beat Ninja Gaiden (3x)
But I’m gonna keep on trying
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3. |
Action Figure Collection
01:23
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I’ve got every action figure I had as a kid
I spent thousands of dollars and I’m really glad I did
My wife says I’m a bum
And thinks my hobby’s dumb
But I don’t mind ‘cause I know it’s awesome
Check out my action figure
My action figure
My action figure collection
He-man, Voltron, Thundercats,
And even G.I. Joe
On display in packages
In my man-cave below
I stare at them all day
They are not meant for play
I wouldn’t have it any other way
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4. |
I'm a Cretin
02:08
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I know I make my own problems
I know I’m always to blame
I never make any progress
You know it’s always the same
And every time I try I fail
My ineptitude always prevails
And I always live up to my name
I’m a cretin, with a capital C
No one in the universe is dumber than me
I’m a cretin, an idiotic fool
It’s totally impossible for me to ever be cool
I know I’m totally useless
I know I’m taking up space
I never wonder if I’ll fail
Because it’s always the case
And every time I cling to hope
I end up proving that I’m a dope
And I’m always easy to replace
I’m a cretin, stay away from me
No one understands why I screw up constantly
I’m a cretin, I only disappoint
It’s totally impossible for me to ever get the point
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5. |
He's a Brony
01:21
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He’s got every pony plush
And he displays them for the world to see
He owns every season of Friendship Is Magic on DVD
Couldn’t care less about what you and your friends think
Cuz he’s a brony
Yeah he’s a brony
He’s obsessed with
My Little Pony
He will travel to Equestria
To find a love he’s waited for
Chosen by Princess Celestia
As Keeper of the Pony Lore
But he’s unsatisfied, his heart still yearns for more
Cuz he’s a brony
Yeah he’s a brony
He longs for equine matrimony
Don’t bust his clops!
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6. |
Heavy Metal Is Best
01:32
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Rock n’ roll is in my blood
And punk rock feels like home
But I can't get that inspired
If it's just 3 chords alone
Twin guitar riffs harmonized
And drums with double bass
Shredding solos always melt my face
I don't mean to split hairs
'Cause I still like all the rest
But it's something that i must get off my chest
Heavy metal is best (4x)
Superior to all the rest
(harmonized guitar melody)
I’ll never be a poseur
I’ll always pass the test
In the halls of metal I’m an honored guest
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7. |
I Wanna Be Japanese
01:33
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I wanna ride the bullet train to work
And slave away all day, feel like a jerk
And eat bowl of ramen every night
And drink Sapporo ’til I feel alright
And go the arcade
Where Street Fighter is played
In Akihabara I’d have it made
I wanna be Japanese (whoa oh oh oh) 2X
I wanna visit old temples and shrines
In bamboo forests I could clear my mind
I wanna read more manga every day
And spend my time at a cuddle cafe
Hang out with otaku
Listen to J-Pop too
Watch anime all day that’s what I’d do
I wanna be Japanese (whoa oh oh oh) 4X
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8. |
Laptop Punk
01:49
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I’m a laptop punk
I’ll never be in a band again
I’m a laptop punk
I make records alone
And my laptop’s junk
It always sounds like a demo
But I still have fun just writing songs at home
And I know where I’m going
“Cause there’s nowhere I’m going
Can’t you see?
I got no expectations
And my situation’s peachy
I’m a laptop punk
And I work a real day job
I’m a laptop punk
I’m a middle-aged dad
And my laptop’s junk
It’s a hand-me-down iMac
But I still make songs each day in Garageband
And I know where I’m going
But there’s no way of slowing
Down for me
I got more motivation
‘Cause my situation’s easy
Let the pop punk revolution now be known
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9. |
Don't Push Mongo
01:38
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Don’t Push Mongo
If you wanna skate, that’s awesome
But you must start off on the right foot
Gotta learn to push correctly
So you will not be misunderstood
Take it from a lifer who bows down to the skate gods
Never push with your front leg, ask not why - just because!
Don’t Push Mongo
I don’t think you’re Randy Colvin
And you sure don’t like like Bill Danforth
So you’d better push with purpose
Don’t look like a poseur coming forth
Anyone who argues probably wears rollerblades
Pushing mongo is a skate stigma that never fades
Don’t Push Mongo
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10. |
Pop Punk PhD
01:15
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He’s played pop punk since before it was a thing
30 years deep in this game
Many bands came and went
Without leaving a mark
Since so many sounded the same
He’s remained all along
Never wrote a bad song
And releases consistently
He’s the professor of songs with 3 chords
He’s a pop punk PhD
He’s toured the world
Yeah he’s played coast to coast
He’s got fans in foreign lands
He even put out many albums and comps
Featuring the coolest bands
And he’s still going strong
Cause he’s known all along
Pop punk will never R.I.P.
He’s got catchy hits in the triple digits
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